ATOP Chapter Sixty-Six

Dear Mama,

We left early this morning... way too early... before the sun rose. I must be getting horribly spoiled if I think that is early. During the war, we had to be up hours before the sun rose... I lost track of time so I never knew exactly when, but it was when the Kapos started screaming. I should not be complaining of getting up early for this trip, especially when I fell asleep again as soon as we got on the road.

We all drew slips of paper to decide who would ride in which vehicle... there are three. Jim and Donna are driving one, Josh and Emma have another, and Ronnie and Rachel in the third. Josh and Emma's is a pickup truck but the rest are big cars, so most have plenty of room left over. I ended up with Josh and Emma though, and Mickey. And this is actually fun, because here I sit writing away in my journal and Mickey is looking over my shoulder, but he has no idea what I am writing because he cannot read Hebrew. He asked me how I write backwards, and he seems fascinated by it all. I am so glad I practiced that Hebrew as hard as I did... tell Papa that I thank him for the lessons, although I know I complained dreadfully when I had to take them. Rachel kept them up with me when we were first in hiding, and I practiced in the camps with a stick in the dirt. It was easiest after the war, when we were surrounded by people like us who openly spoke and taught and learned our beautiful language. Those after-camps, that was actually a good time, in a way. We were all tired and scared and worried, but we banded together and it was a beautiful thing. Just our people, Mama, and lots of them... and Sabbath services and kosher food, although there was not a lot of food, and everyone spoke Hebrew and Yiddish. It really was a good time, Mama. In spite of... everything.

I still dream of Israel, Mama. Every single day I dream of it. Although I do not speak of it often, for it makes Rachel's eyes sad. And I know Shonie is happy here. I could not make her leave. If I go to Israel, I must go alone... or perhaps with Jakob. He has made up his mind to go someday, as soon as he can afford it, which may be a few years yet. He wants me to go with him. 

He kissed me again, just before he left last week... it made my heart beat so fast that it almost frightened me. It was a beautiful moment, Mama, and I'll remember it for always, the way it felt, the way it made me feel. He is so tall and dark and quiet and cheerful at the same time. And he got really quiet in that moment... we were standing at the train station, just before he boarded... and he got really quiet and just looked at me. I must have been trembling all over. And he just very slowly bent his head and pressed the gentlest kiss on my cheek. 

Mickey is getting grumpy now because I am still writing and he wants to play a game or something. I would stop writing, because a game sounds like fun, but it is kind of funny to just keep on while he sits there looking all annoyed and grumbling at me. So I shall make him wait a little longer while I tell you about this scenery... it is rather pretty, with rolling hills and trees. We drove along the lake for a while. Mickey keeps talking about fishing right out on the middle of the lake. He mentioned six foot long catfish which sounds absolutely terrifying.

Speaking of Mickey, actually, I forgot to tell you... he has been learning how to do wood carving and he made a butterfly for me. It is actually really pretty... I believe he has a talent for it. It looks alive... like it could just flutter its wings and fly away. 

I like butterflies. They remind me of... freedom... and hope...

Mickey sighed loudly, in hopes that Rebekah would hear and take the hint, and leaned back against the seat. She was still busily scribbling away, seeming not to notice that he was there at all. Oh well... at least he could be awfully glad that Jakob wasn't there. He wasn't going to say anything against Jakob, really... but he wasn't sorry to see him go. And there was another thing for Mickey to be glad about... for Rebekah had fallen asleep on his shoulder for the first couple hours of the drive. Safe to say those had been some of the best hours of Mickey's life. He felt rather proud of the happening... in fact, it had made a whole new man of him altogether.

Rebekah had left off of the strange foreign characters she had been jotting down and was now sketching long, curving lines on a blank page in her notebook. Mickey turned back to paying attention. He smiled as he saw the form of a butterfly taking shape. She glanced sideways up at him and grinned. He could feel his heart warming... racing, really. For one wild moment he contemplated leaning over to kiss her... but no... best not to push it. So he just grinned back.

"Didn't know you could draw."

"Jah... a little..." She added a few more flourishes to the butterfly... and then changed the tone of her graceful sketch completely by placing a rather cheesy smile and big googly eyes on the butterfly's head. She giggled suddenly, snapping the book shut and laying it aside. Mickey's face brightened. "So... what was this game you wanted to play?"

♡♡♡

The chosen campsite was a little piece of waterfront property up against Lake Michigan, high on the upper peninsula, close to the Canadian border. The Scott family had originally settled there on immigrating from Scotland before moving to Minnesota... but they had refused to part with the Michigan property on account of the perfect fishing and beautiful views. There was a little cabin still there and plenty of room for fire pits and pitching tents. 

Seth and Marci arrived only half an hour after the rest, with their new little one in tow... and the baby was promptly snapped up by Emma and cuddled within an inch of its life. Sophia Rose was the baby's name, and she sported a pair of wide dark eyes and a tiny button nose. 

Mickey couldn't resist a cartwheel and then a wild lap around the entire clearing the moment the truck pulled to a stop. Josh had taught him well. Rebekah simply shook her head at him and turned to Benjie, who was wild with delight to see her again after the long ride. But Benjie's attentions didn't last long, for at discovering himself in this new and delightful place, he was off like a rocket, eager to explore. Left neglected, Rebekah dug out her journal again and went in search of a place to sit alone. 

Dear Mama, it is me again. I just sat to scribble a few words now because there really does not seem to be anything I can do. Right now, Shonie and Benjie are playing with Mickey just along the shore of the lake... they are all three soaking wet and shrieking wildly. It makes my heart glad to see Shonie play like that... just like a little girl should, laughing and happy with her eyes shining. She laughs a lot now, Mama... although I still have not heard her speak a single word. She has not even tried... although she used to, long ago, in the camps. 

There was quite the confusion about where everyone would sleep... you would think they would have gotten all this figured out long ago... They couldn't seem to decide whether to let the older couples have the cabin or the ones with babies. In the end, everyone just seemed to get a bit mixed up. Jim and Donna are taking one room in the cabin, and Ronnie and Rachel are taking the other, with baby Judah. Seth and Marci are going to rough it, they said baby Sophie is old enough to sleep in a tent, so that is that. Shonie and I get our own tent, and Mickey is sharing with Benjie and I know they are going to make awful noise all night long. 

There is a sort of holiday coming up... tomorrow, I think... that the Americans call "Father's Day". Rachel told me it is a day for people to show their fathers how much they love and appreciate them. So... Papa... I know you are there with Mama, and this is for you. It has been an awful long time, dearest Papa, and I miss you so much... and I want you to know how much I love you. We only had a short time together... and yet you were the best Papa in all the world. You meant to keep us safe, to protect us, I know... and you did that, Papa. See... we are safe now, Shonie and I. And maybe... maybe someday... we can be really happy again. I have not been completely happy... but Papa, I have come very close. And I want you to know that Rachel has said the same of you. She told me that Jim... Ronnie's father... is like a father to her now too... but she says that you will always be first in her heart.

It wasn't Mickey who pulled Rebekah away from her journal this time, but Shonie. She came running up to her sister, hands outstretched. She was giggling, dripping hair falling tangled over her eyes. Her hair had been growing and when it was dry, she wore it loose, falling around her face in rich, black waves. But now it was a disaster of what had been a braid in the beginning. Rebekah pushed it away from the little girl's face with a smile.

"I do not want to get wet," she protested as Shonie tugged at her arm. "The water looks cold." But Shonie shook her head, her eyes dancing. "Oh, it is not cold? If you are teasing..." she let her words fall off ominously as her smile widened. "Alright, alright, I am coming..." She let herself be dragged toward the water. 

"Good job, Shonie," Mickey yelled as Rebekah stepped tentatively into the water, no farther than ankle-deep. "You got the scribbler away from her book... that's quite the feat!"

The water was cold, and Rebekah felt like running back to the fireside... but for that impudent remark, she plunged deeper into the water and splashed Mickey as hard as she could. The water fight that ensued left Benjie and Shonie scrambling for shore and brought Josh on a run, yelling wildly like the overgrown little boy he was. 

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